Just saw Watchmen wis Fiddy Fee, and had to drop onto lj before bed to say a few words. Good lord. I can’t remember the last time I came out of a movie this thoroughly dumbfounded. SO INCREDIBLY BAD… a cast of the least interesting characters I can imagine bashing us over the head wis their uninteresting pasts at painful length between scenes of puerilely gory and usually unnecessary action and idiotically pretentious voice-overs, all of which seemed designed to keep the actual story from advancing at all costs…. When after about three thousand hours of this we were finally treated to some plot, the damn thing tried ineffectually to imitate The Dark Knight (which retrospectively seems concise, well-paced, and well-edited in comparison) wis morally ambiguous social reform theory.

None of this would have been so unbelievably bad, though, if the entire thing hadn’t been so excruciatingly, almost intolerably boring. Didn’t one single person on the staff of this movie actually sit through the entire plodding, dragging three hours and make the comment, “Hey, guys, this shit is… kinda tedious…? Maybe instead of reiterating these points this often we should maybe think about actually telling the story…?” About a quarter of the way through I was ready to leave. Isn’t a boring superhero movie against some law somewhere? If it’s not, it should be. A fucking lot of things in this particular movie should be against some law somewhere.